PRESS RELEASE

BOSTON (SAVEYOURSHAVE NEWSWIRE) – Today, Gillette® announced the launch of the world’s first three-headed safety razor.  The new line builds on a century-old safety razor design by using patented Blade Stacking Technology (BS TECH) to triple the number of shaving heads.

BS Razor

“Our breakthrough design is based on our innovative Blade Stacking Technology, also known as BS TECH“, said Todd Sweeney, Vice President of Pseudoinnovation.  “The BS TECH razor takes a proven design and triples it.  Our internal research indicates that more is better, 112% of the time.”

The move is a direct response to the resurgence of traditional wet shaving around the world.  Consumers are switching to safety razors and straight razors for a superior shave at a far lower cost than standard cartridges.  Additionally, traditional wet shaving produces much less waste than disposable plastic razors and cartridges, 2 billion of which end up in landfills annually.

According to Sweeney, “No company can market BS Technology better than Gillette®.  Our multi-blade razors were an early evolution of Blade Stacking, but our new line of wet shaving products is the first to be 100% BS.”

“To develop BS Technology we incorporated extensive feedback from our most important demographic – investors, shareholders and the Board of Directors”, said Sweeney.  “Our board firmly believes that introducing new BS into the market on a regular basis will differentiate us from our competition, while capturing the hearts and dollars of consumers around the world.”

Future products are in development for the BS TECH line of traditional wet shaving products including BS BADGER, a heated vibrating badger brush, and neon-green BS SOAP, BS CREAM and BS BALM.  “In the coming years we will be launching more BS than the shaving world has ever seen”, said Sweeney.

BS TECH is available wherever cartridge razors are sold.

CONTACTS

Please send comments to saveyourshave@gmail.com…unless your comment is a cease and desist letter.  This satirical article is all in good fun.

Further Reading

The purpose of this blog is to share how traditional wet shaving can help men get better shaves and clearer skin.  Here are some additional posts you may find interesting:

Intro to Wet Shaving – A primer on how DE shaving helps give better shaves and clearer skin

Shaving Technique – A “how-to” guide for shaving with a safety razor

DE Shaving Cost Comparison – Analysis comparing the cost of DE shaving vs cartridge shaving (spoiler: DE razors are cheaper than dirt!)

Gear for Beginners – The low-cost tools that introduced me to DE shaving

Razor Aggressiveness Basics – An explanation of what makes a razor “mild” with recommendations for beginning DE shavers

Written by ironbeard

I am a husband, a father of two, and the owner of a small sales and marketing agency. I blog about traditional wet shaving because it helped me get a better shave and clearer skin. I hope my posts can help others to get a better shave too.

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